Thoughts on Representation and Privilege's

Representation is important. 

If we cannot see the faces of those like us, then we will never feel as though we truly belong.

But what is belonging?

Is it being considered a part of the binary scale that holds us all in place?

Or is it feeling content in the knowledge that we will never actually fit in a set place of society?

I wonder these things when it comes to diversity, and acknowledgement in the media, as portrayed in the variety of texts and videos we have seen throughout the semester. 

I also think about how privilege comes into play with representation.

As someone who is white, I have seen representation in the media. 

But I am overweight. I am queer. and I am conflicted on the thought of representation because I have seen my skin tone but not my body size, or my sexuality displayed without it being the butt of a joke in television, and film. 

I know I am privileged to see my skin tone reflected in barbies, in television endlessly, and throughout the media.

But I want to see cellulite, stretch marks, and scars the way that it hasn't been shown.

I want to see a relationship fully fleshed out, written as if it were "normal" in the eyes of society.

I don't want to be traumatized by the aspects of politics and religion that come into play when a character represents aspects of me that make me feel natural and welcomed. 

But I also want others to see themselves on screen as I have, even if there needs to be more work done on the subject. 

I pray for the ability to see all aspects of people in the media. 

Refreshed, and nourished in the eyes of Hollywood so that children can experience diversity and representation more than I did in my childhood. 

I wonder if it will ever happen, or if the church will forever disregard the feelings of those they condemn because they do not understand, or do not have the capacity to try and understand. 

Speaking out gets you hate, and hurt, and I don't want that anymore. 

But I do not know how to go about representation and diversity. 

I do not know how because I was born with the privilege of looking semi-normal.

There is this underlying fear of what normalcy is because I can fake it but I cannot be it.

I can try to shut out the world with whatever substances can numb me from real life.

Or I can face them head-on and be an outcast even more so than I already am. 

How do we project representation in the world if we are scared of how the world judges us?

We can say we don't give a shit that we are rejected but what does that even entail?

We all want to belong in the eyes of society to some extent, but what does it mean to break that down and face it head-on?

We want representation, but when we are represented it is with stereotypes, and typecasting that makes us all look like one entity that the world is scared to look at.

So how do we go about breathing, living, representing, for the children that come after us into this desolate world?

I don't know, but I would like to find out so I can feel something positive for once in my life.